By Frank Lucasale 
Emotional intelligence is not something you teach in one talk.
It’s built through daily habits.
Here are seven things I do on purpose to raise emotionally smart kids.
Habit 1: I label my own feelings out loud.
“I’m feeling overwhelmed right now, so I’m going to step outside for a minute.”
Habit 2: I ask about their feelings at bedtime.
“What was the hardest part of your day? What made you feel happy today?”
Habit 3: I pause and breathe when they’re upset.
I model calm, instead of telling them to calm down.
Habit 4: I validate their feelings before correcting behavior.
“You’re upset about sharing. That’s hard. We can still share safely.”
Habit 5: I repair when I yell or overreact.
“I wish I had spoken more kindly. I’ll try again tomorrow.”
Habit 6: I allow space for sadness, not just joy.
They can cry in my home without being told to stop.
Habit 7: I show them how to make things right, not just say “I’m sorry.”
We practice apologies with action, not just words.
When kids grow up in homes like this, emotional intelligence becomes their default — not something they have to search for later.